Samuel Clemens, better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was to give a lecture in a small Eastern town. He went before dinner to a barber's to be shaved.
"You're a stranger in town, sir?" the barber asked.
"Yes, I'm a stranger here," was the reply.
"We're having a good lecture here tonight, sir," said the barber, "a Mark Twain lecture. Are you going to it?"
"Yes, I think I will," said Clemens.
"Have you got your ticket yet?" the barber asked.
"No, not yet," said the other.
"Then, sir, you'll have to stand."
"Dear me! It seems as if I always do have to stand when I hear that man Twain lecture."
「馬克．吐溫」是撤母耳．克雷門斯的筆名，較原名更廣為人知。有一次，克雷門斯要到東部一小鎮演講，晚飯前先去理髮店修臉。
理髮師問：「先生，你不是本鎮人吧？」
克雷門斯回答說：「不是，我不是。」
理髮師說：「先生，本鎮今晚會有個精彩的演講會，是個馬克．吐溫演講會，你去不去聽？」
克雷門斯說：「會，應該會去的。」
理髮師問：「你有入場券了嗎？」
克雷門斯說：「沒有，還沒有。」
「那麼，先生，你可得站立啦。」
「唉，每次聽這個叫吐溫的人演講，我似乎總是得站着！」